Mega Serials - Hell with them!

I was working on my computer this afternoon in the living room, while the TV was on and there was a Tamil serial going on. Though I wasn't concentrating on what was happening there, a little of it did hit my brain. Nothing else can annoy anyone so much. If the channel is changed during an ad break, the same kind of a different serial is telecast in another channel.

What annoyed me so much about the whole serial concept is that a simple situation is exaggerated to a level that you can never imagine - and that simple situation is usually a family problem or a relationship problem. I would appreciate them, if they were suggesting solutions to these problems, but I don't think that ever happens. All they do is blow up the whole situation, have dialogues that boosts the ego of all the characters involved and not only make it emotional, but also magnify each person's emotions. It's comparatively fine if a lighter moment is exaggerated, but you can never tolerate the way a bad situation is portrayed - everybody crying, complimented by heavy, loud and sad music. Intolerable is the so-called romantic scenes they have - you would literally feel like puking on seeing them. To top it all, rarely an actor acts naturally. They would have a look of surprise or shock throughout.

Since everything is prolonged and dragging, the people who watch it, literally go into it and start identifying themselves with one of the characters, without analyzing if that character's actions are sane or not. And the worst part is, they don't have even a slightest idea that the serials have influenced them so much that all their thoughts, words and actions are connected to one serial or the other.

Movies also influence people, but since they have only a couple of hours to tell you a whole story, things are rarely as intense and you would know the climax in a  couple of hours, and not a couple of years.

I don't even support anyone who argues saying these serials generate huge employment opportunities. The whole serial concept thrives on using the weakness of the people, and any employment opportunity generated hence, is surely not healthy.

You try telling these heavy mega serial watchers to stop watching, all you get in return is one of those serial dialogues.

Please, please, please, stop watching these things. If you are bored, spend your time usefully by sleeping.

Charity begins at home - really???

If this means that without satisfying the wants of the people at your own house/family, there is no point in helping others outside, I wouldn’t really support it.

Whose wants are limited? They are always never-ending.

Consider this situation. I work five days a week, 9 hours a day(plus 3 hours for commuting to work). By the time I’m back home, I’m all exhausted and I have the time only to eat and sleep. Weekends are all that I have to do whatever I feel like doing - from shopping to hanging out with friends, from cooking elaborate meals at home to spending quality time with the family, and its obvious that 2 days per week isn’t enough for all this. So when do I have the time for outside charity, when 2 days per week isn’t enough to satisfy me, my own family and friends?

I can never think beyond my home, if I go with “Charity begins at home”.

There should always be a balance between the time you spend for charity at home, and outside. I would say irrespective of whether you can satisfy the people at home or not, dedicate at-least half a day out of the 2 days for outside charity, thereby balancing both.

So, make sure that charity begins at home, but doesn’t end there!

Learning music

Finally, enrolled in Carnatic music lessons today. I was forced to learn from mom when young. I did learn the basics, but wasn't patient enough to go through each step of proper learning. I used to hear my friends at school sing something, and I would want my mom to teach me the same stuff. As the academic stress increased, I had to give up on learning music, of-course, I wasn't much interested too.

A couple of months ago, I suddenly developed interest in learning music. I thought that since I already knew the basics, I'd straight away learn some songs, so its eay that way.

I had my first class this morning and met my Guru. As I started talking to her, I knew that there was more than music that I had to learn from her.

She wakes up at 4am, does her exercise, after bath, recites slogams and cooks. She also has a very healty diet. She's done with everything by 8.30am, leaves home between 9-10am, and its almost 8pm by the time she returns. She says, music is her passion and stress-buster and hence, despite working throughout the day for several years doing the same work, she has never felt bored or tired. She loves what she does and looks forward to everyday. When I was still wondering how old she might be, she herself said she was 68, after my wrong guess that she was 60. Wow! I can't even imagine being like her when I am that old.

When she can be so active and enthusiastic for her age, I thought how much more active should I be.

She told me, that I'd better learn the basics again, so I can sing anything with ease. She also said, nothing comes easy. If you want to be a good singer, you have to go the hard way.

Well, I did buy her idea.

Self-motivation....

....is exactly what I need right now.

Reading inspirational books/quotes, listening to motivational speeches or a friend's pep-talk do help, but unless I take some time to motivate myself, nothing works, because its me who best knows what I want.

I think, spending some time alone everyday towards self-development is essential. That's when we have to talk to ourselves, watch the unwanted thoughts that crop up and try to kill them. I'm still in the process of understanding what I really like doing, so that I can proceed towards that.

Atleast now I know what I don't like doing. I don't like doing what I was doing for 5 years now. Its not worth it to do something just because it fetches you money. You should look forward to doing it and doing it for a long time should not stress you out. You should not be in a position where you keep checking your watch to see how long it is before you have to leave your work-place. Happiness is the key.

Now is the real challenge of figuring out what to do and how to do it. The first step is to make sure that I'm not distracted at all, which I become very easily. Its good not to heed to others' opinions about you. You cannot please everybody. And, by trying to please someone else, you are only going to feel miserable, because it would amount to you doing certain things that you don't personally like doing.

Its not all about feeling secured in getting a guaranteed salary at the beginning of the month. I have known of some engineers, who after a career in the software industry, chose to quit and work in the media field. It really takes a lot of guts to take a decision like this, when they don't even know if the change of their career path would pay them anything. These guys are real motivators for me.

Writing all this out now helps me understand how very confused I am at this point in time, but I'm gonna hit it and see what happens.

Motivating myself and staying focussed is the need of the hour.

Happy Diwali to you guys!

Chennai today!!!

Landing in Chennai after a year, meeting loved ones at the airport and above all, not having to think about the return date - unexplainable happiness. There is indeed the fear-factor in terms of career, exploring opportunities and wanting to do something useful for yourselves and others, but this is going to be there, irrespective of in which part of the world you are. Infact, in one way it is better to be in India, atleast you have the freedom to do what you want to(not knowing what to do is my own problem), as opposed to some other countries, where you are not allowed to.

After a year in US with just the two of you at home, being with the whole family is heavenly. Their love and affection, sharing of responsibilities, someone cooking for you, etc, is real bliss, of-course all this comes with its own share of misunderstandings, conflicts and more, but yea, what is life, if not for these mixed feelings.

Friends around you, make you feel wanted. Its so damn nice to be back with good old friends and the genuine happiness they show to have you back, makes you think you have taken the right decision of coming back home.

Its been 15 days days in Chennai. and last night before going to bed, I was thinking if I missed the US or the kind of life there - without a second thought, it was a straight NO. Why not? What about the pleasant weather, the less crowded buses and streets, frozen vegetables, juices and ice-creams and all the luxury? Somehow, they don't seem to be a matter of concern at all. Life is more than comfortable with all that is available here. 

Feeling more blessed than ever! Cannot ask for more!

India calling....

I love it when there are changes in life, but when "the time" really comes close, I start thinking about how my past has been and anxious about what the future holds for me. It is one of those times now. Its been a year since I came to the US, and there have been no major changes till then. Well, then its time that something changes - moving back home in a couple of days.

This is the second time I'm getting back to India after spending a year in the US. The US soil has treated me well and I would really miss this place and the family and friends that I would be leaving behind.

Those driving tests at the DMV, the goof-ups while just starting to drive, the not-so-hot weather, the grocery-shopping evenings, those pointless walks down the streets, the peaceful sleep at the library, thinking hard on what to blog about, the yummy Chipotle and Thai food, the bagels, those no-cooking days, the bus-rides, playing indoor ping-pong,ice-hockey and basket ball, the jogs at the park, the evening tennis, the late nights and late mornings, and many more wonderful times would always be cherished. The past year has been a very good break, and its time to get back to work. Here comes an end to all the laziness and lethargy, and am so looking forward to those busy times.

There are going to be a lot of changes and am going to make sure that I blog every bit of them.

India....... Here I come......

Bisibela bath

Bisibela bath(made by my mom) with potato fry - my second favorite dish.

My mom is a specialist in this dish, and all of my friends and family who have tasted hers, say that hers is unbeatable. So, here I am, to prove that I can make it too, as tasty as hers and assure you that its not a big deal.

Those were the days when I thought making bisibela bath was an ordeal, when I got the paste that they sell in stores, which you have to mix with cooked rice, dhal and vegetables. I wasn't quite happy with the taste. Thats when I read some recipes and tried doing it, and came out exactly like what my mom makes, and took the same time it took with the ready-made paste.

This is how I make it....

(Ingredients highlighted in blue)

Rice, toor dhal in the ratio 1:1/2 - Rice and dhal can either be cooked separately or mixed together. I have tried both, and both works. I prefer cooking them together, as the final mixing becomes easier. Cook it in such a way that its neither too flaky(like briyani) nor over-cooked.

Tamarind(lemon sized) - Extract it using water.

Roast and grind the following - In 1tsp of oil, roast 2-3Tbsp corriander seeds, 5-6 red chilis, 1Tbsp channa dhal, 1Tbsp Urad dhal, 1/2tsp fenugreek, cinnamon(1 inch piece), 3-6 cloves and grind these with a little coconut. You can also avoid the coconut if you prefer to, it doesn't hamper the taste.

Small onions(20 approx) - Peel them and fry them in 1tsp of oil till golden brown.

Vegetables - Bell-peppers, beans, double-beans, carrots, peas, potato, cauliflower, zucchini, ash gourd and anything else that you want.

I generally take a pressure pan or pressure cooker bottom depending upon the quantity. Take the tamarind extract, add the ground paste and salt and when it starts boiling, add the cut vegetables in order depending upon the time it takes for each one to cook. For example, I would start with potato, followed by cauliflower, beans, carrot, then bell-pepper, zucchini, peas and onions will come in the end. Cook covered, making sure they are not over-cooked.

Once cooked, add dhal in case you cooked it separately, if not, add the cooked rice-dhal slowly and mix well. Mixing some ghee with the rice enhances the taste, so if you can afford, please do. If you can't, never mind, the dish is still going to taste real good. Garnish with cilantro and cashew-nuts roasted in ghee. Serve with potato fry, raita, papad or chips.

Tips:

1. Make sure the tamarind extract in which you boil the vegetables is not too watery and that the rice isn't over-cooked. I once ended up doing it and it screwed the entire dish.

2. Cinnamon, cloves and small onions are the major taste giving ingredients, the rest of the vegetables you can use whatever is available.

Happy eating :)

Every trip is an adventure!

This is a long pending post, at-least glad that I sat down to write it now. Going to keep it short, sweet and simple :)

We had been to the Wenatchee River to do white-water rafting, a couple of weeks back - a great experience by itself. We had our own apprehensions, both of us being non-swimmers. Luckily enough for us, we finished it all fine without having to fall off the raft.

There were 4 people in our raft(including us) and our guide was Swoony, who instructed us and steered our raft with ease along the rough waters of the river. The river was running lower than usual, which worked out advantageous for us.

Swoony in action

Swoony struck conversations with us every now and then. Someone asked him if he rafts through this river everyday, when he said from May until September he works as a rafting guide for a couple of different companies, working on the same river. He also works at a cafe close-by. When it is off-season here, he goes to Thailand and does the same kind of work there. Of-course, he gets paid comparatively lesser, but he says he likes to go to different places.

He steered the raft as though it was the first time he was doing it. Such was his eagerness and enthusiasm. Every time he did something, he explained to us why he did it and also talked about how the river used to be at different times of the year.

Half way through our journey, we stopped at some place, where they gave us sandwiches and fruits. All the guides of the rafts waited until we were all done, and they ate what was remaining, after which they did the clean-up and we continued rafting again.

I asked him if something(don't remember what), what he replied made me forget what I asked him in the first place. He said,

Every trip is an adventure, every meal is a banquet, every tip is gratitude.

I fell flat. How could he do the same thing over and over again, yet have so much enthusiasm, eat a very simple meal, yet appreciate it so much and not show faces irrespective of whether someone tipped him or not?

For me, it was lesson learnt. I am a person, who gets bored very easily, but I understood that getting-bored is not an excuse anymore. Enthusiasm is the need of the hour. More than what you do, its all about how you do it. After all, all of us ultimately want to be happy and satisfied. Then its better to stop brooding and start loving what each of us do on a daily basis.

Vegetable Biryani

Biryani is my most-favoritest(sorry for my inability to use a better word) dish. You give it to me anytime and I would be more than ready to eat - whether I am hungry or whether its night or day.

Mom used to make yummy biryani. It was a delicacy back then, a dish made rarely and only during the weekends. She made it in large quantities and I would feast on it the whole day. Each time I thought my tummy had a little space, I would munch in a bowl full. Recently, when my cousin visited, she made delicious briyani for lunch, I ate until my stomach couldn't hold even one extra spoon.

At restaurants too, my first choice would be biryani. A lot of people wonder how I would never get bored of eating the same dish, but I choose to eat it. I used to be in night shifts at work sometimes, when there was one cafeteria that would be open at that time of the day, to cater to the food needs of people working at nights. They would most often serve yummy hot biryani at 12am sharp, and I would be there well ahead. The guy who sells the food tokens would give me an ugly look, but who cares, as long as I get biryani. There was yet another cafeteria that served good egg biryani and my last day at work, I made sure I ate it one last time before I quit. I have even had the biryani they sell in streets. As far as biryani in India is concerned, it has never been bad for me.

US has given me some of the worst biryani experiences. There are only a couple of restaurants where they served average biryani, the best of which was in a restaurant called "Woodlands" in Chatsworth near LA. The house in which I stayed was right opposite to the restaurant, I used to frequent there so much, that the people who served there, no more gave me the menu card, they just confirmed if I was ordering biryani. We were once damn hungry during lunch time, and spotted an Indian restaurant, so ordered biryani. All they did was mix a couple of curries they had for their buffet and called it biryani. A few other restaurants also did the same crap to me. Despite this, I still used to order biryani, hoping that atleast one restaurant would make it eatable, but in vain, and I stopped eating biryani outside.

This is when I was desperate and wanted to make it at home. Tried a few recipes, but I found them complicated and not worth the time spent. I bought "Priya" briyani powder, followed the instructions on it, and ended up with a considerably good one. My cousin mailed me "Parampara" biryani paste from New Jersey(now you know how desperate I was) and she gave me instructions of making it. I tried it and it came out very well. So, with the same steps, I tried doing it with the same "Priya" biryani powder, and I'm glad that I got exactly what I wanted.

Its so easy to make(takes exactly 30mins), really tasty and you don't have to worry about an elaborate side-dish - onion raita, chips, applam is more than enough.

Recipe - I owe it to my cousin :)

Tips:

1. Cook basmati rice in such a way that they don't stick to each other. Use minimum amount of water. An electric rice cooker would be ideal. I don't have one, so I cook it in my pressure cooker. I don't put the weight. Once steam comes out, I reduce the flame to medium, cover it with a cup. 15minutes and rice it done exactly the way I want it.

2. Mint is the most important taste giving ingredient. I have prepared it with and without it - trust me, mint does the magic.

Ingredients:

Vegetables, onions, mint, briyani powder, curd, chilli powder, garam masala, oil, ghee, salt

Method:

I start out by cooking the rice first, so that, by the time the rice is ready, I can chop all the vegetables. Take 3 Tbsp of briyani powder, make a paste by mixing the curd with it and keep it aside. Now chop the vegetables. The vegetables I usually use are potato, cauliflower, beans, carrot,bell pepper, peas, broccoli, etc. and mushrooms. In a pan, take 2tsp of oil and one tsp of ghee and once it is hot, fry the mint and onions and then add the vegetables. Then add the briyani paste, a little chilli powder, garam masala powder, salt for the vegetables, mix well and cook covered. Make sure you don't overcook them. Once cooked, add the cooked rice to it, enough salt for the rice and mix well. Serve hot with onion raita.

This is the easiest and the tastiest dish I have ever made. I prefer to use very less oil, which makes the dish look a little dry, but it doesn't matter to me, as the taste it still good and I anyways have it with the raita and above all, its healthy.

I love to have a lot of vegetables in it, so I use more, but its upto you. And as far as the quantities of the briyani, chili and garam masala powders go, when you make it once, you'll know how it tastes, depending upon which you can use them to suit to your tastes. It doesn't make sense for me to tell the exact right amount here as tastes differ.

Happy eating :)

Happy birthday Krishna!

Patram puspam phalam thoyam

yo me bhaktya prayacchati

Tad aham bhakty-upahrtam

asnami prayatatmanah

- Bhagavad Gita 9:26

Meaning - Whosoever offers Me with love a leaf, a flower, a fruit or even water, I appear in person before that selfless devotee of sinless mind, and delightfully partake of that article offered by him with love.

This verse is close to my heart. It teaches us two important qualities - humility and devotion(love). How you offer something is the only thing that matters and not what you offer. You may offer just water, but the pure love with which you offer the same is what counts. You may offer the most expensive thing on the face of the Earth, but if you think its the material value of the offering that counts, thats not true. Irrespective of the material worth of the offering, offer it with all the humility and the love.

Makes total sense. When somebody gives me a gift, I don't really care of how much it costs or what gift it is. The fact that the person was so thoughtful enough, makes me immensely happy. How annoying would it be if someone gives you an exorbitant gift, just for the sake of showing off to his friends what he is capable of?

Anyways, Krishna Jayanthi preparations for me, started keeping this in mind. I made vella seedai and uppu seedai, the 2 important dishes that are usually made a couple of days before and by the look and feel of it, I thought it came out very well. I was even planning to post the recipe, but unfortunately it was not as I had thought it would be. Who cares man? Its the love that matters :)

Last night I took up this task of drawing "ezha kolam", which of-course I am very bad at. But considering that fact that I didn't have a deadline, I searched up on the internet and ended by drawing considerably good kolams. This is the kolam blog that I referred to. I liked it, beacuse it had the method step-by-step. And I would have looked funny to anyone who saw me in action, as I had my laptop in front of me, and was copying from it.

The actual pooja was today and I planned to make "Mysore Pak" this morning and it was the first time I was into making this. And surprisingly it came out very well. It was neither too hard nor too soft. It was in the right consistency and taste.

Recipe in brief:

Ingredients - besan flour - 1 cup, sugar - 2 cups, ghee - 1 cup, Water - 1/2 cup (This was the exact quantities I used, from some website online)

Heated the water in a heavy-bottomed vessel and added all the sugar to it. After the sugar dissolved and reached the string-consistency, added the flour to it little by little, and kept stirring simultaneously, so that there were no lumps were formed. I wasn't able to handle it by myself, so had an assistant, who did the stirring for me. After it was mixed well, added the ghee, mixed it well again, and once it all fully mixed, poured the mixture in a greased plate and sliced it after a couple of minutes.

(Don't have a picture of it after having sliced it, this was taken before. Sorry about that)

In-spite of all these dishes, lots of fruits and a delicious meal, Krishna's all-time-favorite Aval and butter were the most important ones. The pooja went on really well and we offered everything to Him with utmost love and humility.

I take this occasion to thank my wonderful friends who gifted the Krishna idol and the Radhe-Krishna picture for my wedding. This is a treasure for me, guys :)

Let Krishna shower his choicest blessings on us, and let us offer all the love that we have to him :)

What is cooking for me

I don't call myself a person who is very interested in cooking, rather a person who cooks out of necessity, because, necessity is the mother of invention ;)

I started cooking 6 years ago. I learnt a little bit of cooking from my dad when I started, and the rest from cook books, internet and of-course, from a lot of people like aunts, cousins, friends, etc. The most pitiful part is that I never learnt an inch of cooking from mom(who was a great cook), because I never thought I would ever have to cook in all my life. When mom used to say "A woman has to end up having to cook, at some point of time or the other", I strongly refuted saying, I would have a full-time paid cook at home when I get married. Those were the good times :)

Back then, somehow, I was into this routine menu. I restricted myself to cooking dishes that I was familiar with and hardly tried out anything new. It was mostly rice, dhal, vegetable, rasam or sambhar. This was also because we had the best restaurants in Chennai, that if I had a craving for a certain food, its easy to go out and eat, rather than cook at home :)

I still remember the first time I made roti. I asked my aunt over phone and started making the dough. As I started mixing the flour and water, at one point I thought there was more water and added little flour, now I thought there was not enough water, and this happened for a while, until I felt the dough was too sticky and I couldn't handle it. Totally annoyed, I called my aunt in hope of asking her a remedy. She had a hearty laugh, after which she came home from work, made the dough and made the rotis for me as well. What a shame! I didn't even know how to make dosa, leave alone making the batter. This was until 3 years back. But I should admit I did start improving. Last month I made 40 rotis with ease, when I invited people for dinner :)

The past year was glorious for me in terms of cooking. I was bored of cooking the same kind of stuff and coincidently the person who was dependent on my cooking preferred variety. I love eating outside often, but having dined at almost all the places that I liked to, some sort of a boredom crept up, with the same same menu that I found in the restaurants. And my favorite dishes here(in the US), lacked the authentic taste. These are some of the factors that forced me to try new stuff, not because someone was waiting on me, but because, I have a huge craving for good food :)

I used to cook for my dad who had restrictions in oil consumption, and ended up cooking with bare minimum oil. Till date I am in the same habit. Of-course this sure does no compromise in the taste. I have had people call me names because of this.

I am at the top in the list of the "laziest people on the face of this Earth" and my cooking sure reflects this. I won't feel like cooking until I'm hungry and once I'm hungry, I have to finish cooking before my hunger can reach the peak :)

So, for all the lazy bums out there, here I go.... planning to document anything interesting that I cook/have cooked, with all the funny tales associated with the process and of-course the tips that I get/got from a lot people.

Hope I enjoy doing this and you enjoy reading too.

Happy cooking.... no.... errrrr..... Happy eating :))))))))))

A proud Indian

Dear Mother India,

Help us realize how proud we should be, for having born on your soil. Despite having so many children, you have made sure that you have been gracious enough to all of us. You have given us rich values and traditions besides satisfying our basic needs. You have made us feel unique in the midst of the rest of the world, in terms of the diversity of cultures prevailing in the different parts of the country. You have given us the unlimited freedom to do whatever we desire to, which no one else gives. Above all, the warmth, care, love and brotherhood that we get from you, can't be had from anyone else.

Despite taking so much from you, I have a feeling that we are not giving back enough. We live our life like a race and are always concerned only about our wellness. We don't even have the time to offer a word of prayer for you everyday. Yet, you have not stopped giving unto us. Who can ever be so benign?

In the name of religion we fight and hurt others' feelings, failing to understand that all of us are your children and that no religion demands that you hurt others' feelings. Child abuse, slavery, rape, corruption are on the increase, as little do we think that we are hurting our siblings. We have read how much of a toil it was years back to gain the freedom that we have now, but we are using it in the wrong way. Are we shackling ourselves again?

Mother, open our eyes. Help us be considerate and respect others. Let us shower all the love that we have on our fellow human beings, so that we are an example for the future generation.

سارے جہاں سے اچھا ہندوستان ہمارا
ہم بلبلیں ہے اس کی یہ گلستاں ہمارا
(Better than the entire world, is our Hindustan;
we are its nightingales of mirth, and it is our garden abode)

பாருக்குள்ளே நல்ல நாடு
எங்கள் பாரத நாடு - பாரதியார்

-A proud Indian

Staying calm

I was talking to my cousin a couple of days ago and she was telling me about a close friend, Amy(name changed), who was in stage 4 of cancer. Amy has 2 kids, and my cousin says that for all the mischief and misbehavior of the kids, Amy stays as calm as ever. She was amazed as to how any mom would not get annoyed or angry, for which Amy says that cancer cells multiply faster when angry or stressed, so she'd rather stay calm.

This conversation struck me big time. I started searching the internet about the ill-effects of anger and stress and no wonder every search result came up with a unanimous answer - it does take a toll on your body. It can be anything from head-ache, migraines, rapid breathing or chest pain to stroke, heart attack or cancer.

I am no exception. I tend to get triggered easily and have been trying to work on it. Sometimes I deal with it consciously and a lot of times I don't. Talking about dealing with it consciously, I know what/who the cause for my anger is and I talk/shout about it to someone else who can patiently listen. Having vented it out, I become normal. But the best thing that worked for me(though I most often forget about it) is not to be reactive at all. When I know the cause for my anger, if I analyse the whole situation all by myself, thinking in terms of others as well, I do come to a rational understanding. But this involves immense practice. This method is really helpful when the person who you are angry at is right in front of you. The former method of talking it out, most of the times doesn't work, because I'm not sensible when I'm angry and this might end me up in talking something that the other person wouldn't like to hear. Once I calm down and think about what happened, if I realize that I was wrong, I am going to feel really bad for it. So, not immediately reacting is good for us and those around us as well.

The worst thing is when I don't know why I am angry or stressed, and any amount of thinking about it will go in vain. This is when I get easily irritated and show it out on others for no fault of theirs. And once calm, I go behind the people-affected-by-me, apologizing.

I had been to the temple last week when there was a special pooja. After everything was over, I was doing some washing(there were a lot of vessels to be washed and it was already late at night), when the priest's wife told me that she'd take care of it later. I told her that I'd be glad to finish it now, so that she doesn't have that pressure the next morning. She smiled and calmly said that God will somehow make it happen for her and she doesn't worry about it. And I for sure knew she meant what she said. I felt ashamed. Loads of vessels were piled up for washing and they were required the next morning. There were lots of instances when my sink at home had a few dishes to be washed, and I brooded over it badly. Stress and pressure is what we define and how we look at things.

My heart-felt prayers go out to Amy and her family and to every individual in every corner of the world to have an anger-free life.

Let peace be on Earth!!!

Physical fitness - mandatory

I regret being a zero-physically-active person all this while. All I had done was crooned over books or worked on a computer. I did do a little playing-with-friends as a kid, but even that died as academics became taxing and the thought of a physical exercise or playing a game was the last thing that I ever thought of doing. As days progressed, I got used to the routine and laziness took over me.

When I see these people in America, a lot of who seem to be fitness freaks, I envy them. Its a pleasure to see people jog with all the grace. The swimming pools are always bustling with people. The tennis courts, soccer fields, basketball courts, are hardly free. Hiking is something which people do regularly. We had driven to a mountain range one afternoon and driving on those windings almost got us tired until we started spotting bikers on the road, biking their way up the hill. I wonder how long they had been biking.

I think its really important to make some form of a physical activity mandatory for kids, either at school or after, so that it gets into them when they are young.

With the stressed up work and home life that we are experiencing these days, I know there is hardly anytime to go for a walk or play a game. But the fact is that, a physical workout will help a great deal in coping up with stress. Also, indulging in physical activities with the family is one way to spend quality time with the members.

Staying in shape is very much focussed on these days, but the ways undertaken for the same, is sometimes going hungry. Due to lack of time or lethargy, its easier for some of us to go hungry than work-out. This might help you be in shape, but may lead to other health complications. The best way to stay fit is eating right amounts of the right kind of food, combined with regular work-outs.

It is a widely accepted belief that regular physical exercise will reduce the occurrences of heart related ailments and keep diabetes in check, apart from helping staying in shape.

I know, taking time out of the busy daily schedule is going to be difficult, but here are some thoughts(specially for women, as they are the ones who are branded as people who should cook at home). Men(who don't cook or help at home), can't give excuses as they have all the time in the morning before they have to leave for work. For the others, I would say, keep the cooking simple. Not having to spend a lot of time cooking, will save some time required to exercise.

We are used to eating elaborate meals at-least thrice a day. We need idli/dosa/pongal not forgetting sambar/chutney for breakfast, rice for lunch and rice/roti and the like for dinner. With this kind of an eating routine, we end up spending most of the time cooking and a tougher time trying to stay in shape. I would rather go with an elaborate meal once a day and the other meals would be something that I would not have to spend much time to prepare, like cereals, fruits, sandwiches, salads,juices,etc. These are not only easy to make, they are healthy too. Week-ends are always there to splurge upon :)

I have been doing some walking/playing lately. The resulting body pain sometimes(in-fact, lot of times) puts me off, and I tend to skip doing it, but trying hard to make it regular :)

Work-out, stay fit, have a less-stressed, fun-filled life!

Guy or girl - how does it matter?

I'm talking about the duties of children towards their parents. According to Hinduism, the duties of a guy are to take care of his wife/children and his aged parents. The duties of a girl after wedding is to take care of her new family viz. husband, kids and parents-in-law, respect elders in the family and keep the flag of her new family flying high. Accepted.

But, I was wondering if there is a place where the duties of a girl towards her parents is specified. I searched on the internet for instances, couldn't find any. Spoke to a few people and each one of them had varied opinions. One of them says if the parents have a son, it the son and his wife who have to take care of them and the daughter is bound to take care of her in-laws. If a couple has no sons, it is their karma, and they can't/won't expect their daughter to take care of them. An aunt of mine says, if a girl has to manage 2 families at a time, she wouldn't be able to do either of them well. So, her duty is only to her new family and doing them properly is the only duty that she has towards her parents as well, as this the only thing about her that would make them proud. And another person had a totally different opinion on the whole thing. The rules laid down in those old books don't hold good now, as it is a different situation altogether. Girls were not educated much or financially independent back then, so they were under men, unlike now, when the scenario is totally different. Applying centuries old rules to the current situation is absurd. Every individual knows what she wants and has to act accordingly.

Like every guy who feels he has certain duties towards his parents who toiled to bring him up to where he is now, there is nothing wrong for a girl to have the same feeling towards her parents. How do we balance it?

This is how I would like to handle the whole thing. I would assess where my help/presence is needed most and try to do all that I can, be it husband, kids, parents, in-laws, siblings, friends,cousins,etc. The need of so many people around is definitely bound to clash, where I got to use my discretion and do the right thing. I feel it would be comfortable this way, rather then following some rules that you are not happy following and always working with a conflict in mind.

The problem arises when the people around you, each one of them want you to follow different set of rules, or maybe even the same set of rules, not even because they want to, but because the society wants to, and your personal preferences don't match with what they expect out of you.

I do know of a lot of parents who wouldn't feel comfortable to stay at their daughter's place as opposed to staying at their son's place. I feel that people don't prefer to have a girl child, as they think girls are of no use to them in the future, and which is also why female infanticide, female illiteracy are still rampant.

I wish there was a universal rule written somewhere, that would make everyone happy and work conflict-free.

My intention of writing down the conflict that I have, is hoping to find solutions/opinions from people who know/experienced similar conflicts. Any help rendered to me in this regard will be much appreciated :)

Free-will vs Destiny

Had this discussion yesterday and the confusion that I have had for a long time now and thought was complicated and didn't care about, was cleared(at-least I think so).

I was listening to an Upanyasam when this topic came up yet again.

Watch from the 13th minute if you don't have the patience to watch the whole video.

It is said that everything is pre-determined. If something is destined to happen to you, it will happen no matter what. Then where comes free-will in the picture?

Read Ramanuja's commentary of a couple of verses of The Gita. Each action is attributed to 5 causes(all 5 of them)

1. Body 2. Senses 3. Individual soul 4. Force of vital air 5. Supreme soul

This means that the individual self is responsible for the action, but no action can happen without the support or permission of the Supreme Soul.

I wasn't clear until I read this example(from Ramanuja's commentary). Consider 5 people lifting a heavy stone. Only the combined effort of the 5 of them can make the action happen. Even if one of them is not willing, the action doesn't happen.

Apply the above example to every action. Without the agreement of all the 5 causes, an action cannot happen, which implies that we(individual soul) are one-fifth responsible for each action.

If the Individual Soul also has to agree for an action to occur, where comes the question of being pre-determined? What if the Individual Soul doesn't agree for an action, how will it happen even if it was pre-determined? It will, because of the Karma that the Individual Soul is subjected to, and Karma is cumulative. Whatever you do(good or bad), there will be an effect.

If the Individual Soul works on the basis of Karma, then where comes free-will? It does. What action you are subjected to now, is a result of what you did in the past and your future actions depend on your current actions.

This implies that both destiny and free-will exist.

In the above video, Swami says there is no free-will, except in choosing the path that will lead you to God, which means that you have to surrender your free-will to God.

It is wise to use the free-will in a good manner, to reduce the bag of sorrows. Wiser it is, to surrender the free-will also to the Supreme Soul, as we don't really know what is good.

Nama Kirtanam

Had a chance to watch quite a few episodes of the show "Veedu Thedi Varuvaan Vitalan" by Sri. Muralidhar Swamiji aired on Vijay Tv and have no words to describe the experience. The discourses mainly revolved around Lord Pandurangan of Pandaripuram and about the Bhakti of great men who lived there. The way Swami narrates the stories, he almost makes us feel we were witnessing the incident. And for a restless and impatient person that I am, who doesn't willingly listen to spiritual discourses, Swami literally made me wait for the next episode.

There is not one episode where he does talk about "Nama Kirtanam". Nama Kirtanam means "Singing the Holy name of God". It is said that the only thing that can liberate us in this present Kali Yuga is Nama Kirtanam. Swami kept reiterating it, that I got into the habit of chanting Nama Kirtanam every morning and it gives immense sense of security. I get the feeling that whatever is happening to me is given by Him and He is the Only One who knows what is best for me.

I usually have the habit of asking Him what I want and also pray for people who I know, who are in trouble. Somehow these days, the people-in-trouble-list is increasing exponentially and none of us have any control over it. A person might be intelligent, a hard-worker and devote all this time towards his exam preparation, but he might not get the marks he expected. This does not mean the person isn't knowledgeable enough. It only means that none of us have control over what happens.

We keep hearing about terrorist attacks, natural calamities, etc., more often than ever. The serial bomb blasts in Mumbai yet again - is there anything that I can do to stop all this or help the victims? As an individual I think I have a duty towards fellow people, but I really didn't know what it was or of what help I could be. The only thing I could think of was chanting Nama kirtanam for the goodness of the world, which I did today.

I recently read in a book that good and bad exist, to create a balance. I least understand this. Why can't it be only good? What kind of imbalance will there be if we were surrounded by goodness always? Again the definition of "good" differs. What is "good" to me is "bad" to someone else. Is this what the balance is all about? I am confused. Amidst all this chaos, the only thing that gives me solace is Nama Kirtanam.

In Mahabharatha, Yudhistira asked Bhishma(when in death bed) the following questions: "In this universe who is the one Deva of all? Who is the one greatest refuge for all? Who is the one Divinity by praising and by worshipping whom a man attains good? Which according to you is that highest form of Dharma (capable of bestowing salvation and prosperity on man)? What is that by uttering or reciting which any living being can attain freedom from cycle of births and deaths?" Bhishma's answer to the above questions was "Vishnu Sahasranama", which is nothing but the divine names of the Lord, chanting which a person will be liberated.

A lot of other religions also dwell in reciting the Holy names of the Lord.

Whatever you ask in my name, I will do it, that the Father may be glorified in the Son; if you ask anything in my name, I will do it.

Christianity. John 14.13-14

Contemplate solely the Name of God--

Fruitless are all other rituals.

Sikhism. Adi Granth, Suhi, M.1, p. 728

If there be anyone who commits evil deeds... let him utter the name

"Buddha Amitayus" serenely and with voice uninterrupted; let him be continually thinking of Buddha until he has completed ten times the thought, repeating, "Namu Amida Butsu." On the strength of uttering Buddha's name he will, during every repetition, expiate the sins.

Buddhism. Meditation on Buddha Amitayus 3.30

To God belongs 99 names, 100 minus 1, anyone who memorizes them will enter Paradise.

Prophet Muhammad

Hara Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare

Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare

Give it the choice and space....!

Started watching "The Cosby Show" recently and got addicted to it. This was aired on TV sometime during the mid-80s and it's surprising that it is relevant even today. I finished season 1 in less than a week's time and into Season 2 now. There are upto eight seasons(I think) and my entertainment for the next couple of months is assured :)

There is this family which has a husband(Bill Cosby) and wife who are doctor and lawyer respectively, and they have 5 kids(4 daughters and a son). The show for the most part takes place in their household and portrays the day-to-day scenario which we are/were a part of, in such a witty way, that you can't, but ask for more.

The love between the husband and wife after years of marriage and the way they bring up their kids, the values they impart in them and most-importantly, how they do it, is what makes it worth watching.

They don't impose anything on the kids. They give them the CHOICE, and its upto the kids to choose what works best for them. That way, the kids get to think for themselves and analyze, and be responsible for their choice, rather than blaming the parents.

Sending kids out of the house after a certain age - is it healthy? It totally is and I fully endorse it. Sending kids out doesn't mean getting rid of them or not willing to spend for them anymore. It means that it is high time they see the world with their own eyes. How do you think it is possible for a kid who has been under your wings forever, to take his own decisions, to be responsible, to start a family and to have his own kids? Are you going to be growing his kids as well? Is this healthy?

Which of the 2 scenarios is better - Everybody staying together, with conflicting ideals, forced to put up with each other, ego-clashes and end up losing the love and respect for each other or though not staying together, meet up often and making the love and respect grow by the day? I prefer the later.

Distance has always worked for me. I did go out of home after I was done with school, and I was a changed person, which people around me have always pointed out. I think that gave me the strength, courage and confidence that I could take up and deal with things on my own. Moreover, the love for home grew in leaps and bounds and with all this comes a satisfaction that you are the one who are deciding what you want to do. I do have other long-distance-relationship stories that have totally worked out, which I will pen later maybe ;)

"The Space" really lets you be who you are, and not what someone else wants you to be. For all relationships to work and the magic in them to exist, I think giving each other the space they need does the trick. Too much of intrusion only complicates things.

I don’t mean to talk against living in a joint-family. If all is well between the members, if everyone can co-exist without disrupting the peace and aspirations of others and if happiness and love prevails always, then joint family is the way to go. But, if people stay together just because they have to show the society they are living in a joint-family, there is no point.

Now, how I plan in taking my life forward? My parents are used to the joint-family setup and that is what has been passed on to me. So, I prefer staying with them and taking care of them. But, I wouldn’t want to pass this on to my kids. I would give them the choice and the space and be there for them when they need me.

Choice and space make the difference.

Appreciating what we have!

This is something that I have heard and read time and again, but have never really done it. The realization always comes only after having lost something that I used to have.

What is lost need not necessarily be a priced possession, but once lost it seems priceless.

We don't appreciate the value of good health until we fall sick.

We don't appreciate the value of a loved one until we miss them.

We don't appreciate the value of a job until we lose one and try in vain, searching for a new one.

We don't appreciate the value of summer until winter comes and vice versa.

I am sure the list goes on, these are just a few.

I remember reading this somewhere : "We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have" , which is very true.

Its imperative that once we wake up every morning, we should think of all that we have, and be thankful for them. I do this once in a while, most often forget doing it, and losing something will remind me of it.

Non-appreciating will lead to "taking things for granted", which is very unhealthy, specially when it comes to relationships.

This is one thing that we are going to feel bad once we realize we have not done it, so we better take the time to remind ourselves everyday.

திருக்குறள் (Thirukkural) 396

தொட்டனைத் தூறும் மணற்கேணி மாந்தர்க்கு

கற்றனைத் தூறும் அறிவு.
For those who can't read Tamizh,
Thottanaithu Oorum manarkeni maandharku
Kattranaithu oorum arivu.

This is one of the most famous verses in Thirukkural. If you have had Tamizh language as a part of your curriculum, I'm sure you might have not missed this verse. I am no exception. This verse was in the "important questions" for exam category, and I remember having memorized it when I was in 4th or 5th grade (and am surprised I remember it now, despite my poor memory). Thirukkural was stressed so much back then, that there were Thirukkural competitions held in the class regularly, where we were supposed to recite the verses. I once got the third place and was given a radium sticker for prize :)

I happened to hear this particular verse in a movie that I saw yesterday and it struck me like lightning.

Translation of this verse : "As a sandy fount yields more water every time you dig, so does knowledge grow, the more you read, the deeper."

Why this struck me? I have let my brain rust for years now. Especially the past year has been worse. For the amount of "free" time I have had, the useful reading that I have done is negligible. I think its high time I catch up with all the reading and knowledge acquisition that I should have done years back.

Also, the reason I still remember this verse is the number of times I was made to read it back then. And one of the reasons I don't remember as much of anything that I read in the recent past is that, I basically don't care. Everything can be found on the internet and I can "copy and paste" whenever I want. Internet FOR ME, has been more of a curse than a blessing. It has made me lazy. Of-course, I didn't mean to blame the internet :)

So, the conclusion of this post, if you have to become wise, stop using the internet, stop copy-pasting.... I'm sure you all are super mad already :)

On a serious note, it is rightly said that a good book is man's best companion. People might let you down, but the books and the knowledge that is acquired from them, will only make you wise and strong. Keep reading.... :)

What is "being modern"?

When someone tells me "I am a modern person" it really annoys me when they invariably mean their physical attributes like the dress/footwear/jewelry they wear or their make-up or hair-do.

For me, being modern only relates to ones thoughts. If I am able to adapt myself with the changing ideals of the present era, without compromising on my own ideals, and at the same time, not forcing my ideals on others, I will call myself modern. Per my definition, I can remain "modern" forever, irrespective of how old I become.

The only "ever-modern" person that I've known till date is my mom and all the "non-modern" people out there will surely disagree. She was this calm and serene, always-saree-clad woman, who wouldn't talk unnecessarily, endowed with enormous patience, wouldn't get irritated easily, had zero-ego(I really mean it!) and zero-temper, was selfless, had no-one that hated her whilst she herself never disliked anyone, very soft-spoken, being non-intrusive with anybody else's life unless her help was needed....

The above qualities in her that make me call her ever-modern, also makes the so-called modern people call her non-modern.

I wish I could be as modern as she was.

Of-course, I am not forcing my definition on anyone. This is just my way of looking at being-modern.

Donate blood!

I happened to read quite a bit about blood donation and blood banks today and was taken aback to know the amount of hardship we have to undergo if we needed a pint of blood. There is so much blood shortage everywhere.

Who can we blame for this situation? Who else, but ourselves. Despite being all educated and sophisticated, a lot of us still hesitate to donate blood. We are either too scared or too busy.

Some recent articles that talk of blood shortages:

http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2011-05-18/hyderabad/29555775_1_donation-camp-blood-safety-blood-donations

http://www.anhourago.in/show.aspx?l=8450468&d=502

Its pathetic to know how a family has to literally hop from bank to bank, from hospital to hospital, to fetch blood for a child who has to be given blood once every month for a medical condition that she has. Also, due to the high demand of blood, some blood banks sell them for high prices, and people are forced to buy.

Or, you can't get blood unless you give a replacement blood, which means, when you need blood, its up to you to find someone of the same blood group(sometimes they accept other blood groups also, depending upon the demand) who can give blood, which is very difficult to find.

What will we end up doing if we are put up in situation? We don't have to worry because we know someone from the blood bank or a relative is a doctor or we have enough money to buy blood, however expensive it may be? Still, none of this will help if there is no blood available.

Donating blood, is infact a healthy act in terms of the donor's health also.

1. Lower iron levels in the body every time you give blood, which can help reduce the risk of heart disease.

2. Helps lower your risk of cancer. Consistent blood donation is associated with lowered risks for cancers including liver, lung, colon, stomach and throat cancers. Risk levels dropped in correlation with how often participants donated blood.

3. Help the body function more efficiently by allowing it to replenish the blood supply regularly. . This process of replenishment can help the body stay healthy and work more efficiently and productively.

Above all, the satisfaction obtained is boundless.

Something that I didn't know before - A normal healthy person can donate blood once in every 56 days. If we all donate regularly, imagine how much can be collected.

There won't be any discomfort after donating, usually. Sometimes there might be a little giddiness, but it won't exist more than a few minutes. They say its advisable to eat well before and after giving blood.

I remember donating blood in my college Lion's club blood drive, because they were giving cookies, fruits and juice and also because we could escape from the afternoon session of classes. A group of us planned and went to give at the same time, so we can also have fun, simultaneously. Unfortunately, they weren't able to take enough from me as the veins were too small or blocked(don't remember exactly), but it was fun. I didn't know then, how much a blood donation meant.

A wide-spread myth - Women can't donate blood, which is not true at all.

Sometimes, I tend to have silly questions like "what is the purpose of life?" What is life apart from family, friends, job, money? It is acts like these that will keep us going.

Donate blood, as blood can't be manufactured and others deserve it too :)

Rage for BUYING engineering college seats

I guess this post had to come from me immediately after the announcement of the XII grade results both the State Board and CBSC. I got to a talk to a few people rigorously involved in engineering admissions and have some observations/suggestions. Better late than never!

First of all, the increasing demand of buying a seat in the management quota has exponentially increased, reasons being many. All I can think of are:
1. I expected "x" marks in my board exams and fell short by a whisker. I aimed for a seat in "y" college, which I don't think I would be able to get now. I think I deserve a seat in the college, so am going to buy it.
2. Reservations due to caste system. The students belonging to OC(forward caste) are facing more pressure due to comparatively high cut-off range for them. On what basis are these reservations done? I have no idea. Is this the question of affordability or the facilities available for children at home? Does it mean students who belong to OC are rich? No way. I have known of children of the temple priests who study with great difficulty and the parents not being able to afford to give them higher education. They belong to OC. I have also known of a lot of students from MBC(Most Backward Caste), who come from very wealthy families. Not sure based on what all these obsolete reservations are made.
3. Peer pressure - A lot of my friends have already got a seat through the management quota, not willing to wait for the counseling, which is more than a month from now.
4. Status - I want to be raising my collars and say that I am studying in "y" college.
5. Some reasons that parents give - I don't want my son to go to a mediocre college, as there will be no competition.

Why does everyone want to go to "y" college? This is what people have to say.
"Y" is a good college. Now, on what basis do you rate a college? Based on which college sets the highest cut-off for admissions? Based on infrastructure? Based on the faculty? Whichever it maybe, I would say it least matters, unless you have very high marks, so you have 3 colleges from the same category to choose from.

For the rest of the students, I would say, the right thing to do is wait your turn.

Why am I so confident in telling so? According to me, there is nothing called a "good" or a "bad" college. This might hold good for schools but surely not for colleges. You might want to choose a "good" school, because that is the prime time, when students have to be moulded properly. This doesn't apply for colleges. The students are adults now. They know what they want to do. They have that discretion.

Technology and exposure and networking(and what not???) is boundless these days. I don't have to depend on my lecturer to teach me a particular subject. I open my computer and the world is in front of me. I am connected to all my friends, thanx to facebook, and I can have open discussions on what they are doing, be it the reference books or project ideas. What more do I need?

How does the college that I am attending matter anymore? What matters is my INTEREST. If I am not passionate about doing something, then studying in "y" college is also not going to help me grow.

I heard this from a reliable source. He had gone to a few engineering colleges to enquire about the availability and cost of management seats and this is what was done to him. The security guard, asked him to leave all this things(cell phone, paper, pen, wallet, etc.) outside. Once he went in, the guy at the counter made a phone call to an anonymous person who was quoting the price of the seats and cut the phone abruptly. No cell phones are allowed inside, fearing that someone might record what was happening in there and let it out. They themselves know what they are doing is not right.

But, if we go to them and buy the seat, are we right? Doesn't it mean that we are blindly encouraging them? I read an article in ibnlive, that says it is illegal to offer management seats until the counselling is over(read the last but one paragraph).

Guys, wake up! Irrespective of what college you study in, your degree is still going to be given by "Anna University".

Anna University hasn't announced the rank yet, but don't fret thinking if you would get an admission during counselling. I saw this website that approximately tells you where you stand. They also have a college finder, so you have an idea of what to expect.
http://www.tneahelp.in/tneacutoff.html

I personally think its a good feeling to study in a college where I deserve to, which is what I did. The attitude to prove yourself will be more and you will work harder. This will not happen when you buy the seat. It will be taken for granted.

Also take into account the money involved. It can be used for something more useful, like a developing your own project idea or doing masters.

Don't go by what others have to tell you. Its your future. You know what you want better than anybody else does. And, nobody else cares about you as much as you do. Think before you act!

Good luck!

Let go of the past, you are what you choose to be NOW!

This is what I consider the most important message in the movie, "Kung Fu Panda 2". Po, the panda, was under the impression that his father was the goose, until he started thinking who he really was and how would a goose be a Panda's dad. Since then, he started having vague nightmares of his mom and dad, but nothing was clear to him. When he went in search Shen, the peacock, who was determined to destroy the whole of China, he met up with a master, the goat, who revealed Po's past.

Shen was conquering a village where the Pandas were living, and during the struggle, Po's dad had to abandon Po in order to save him. The goose found Po and brought him up like his own son. On hearing the story of his past Po freaks out, which is when the goat says "Let go of the past, you are what you choose to be".

Letting go of the past, is one important virtue that I think all of us must cultivate. It not only helps us, but also the people around us. I have experienced this a lot of times. When I have the past grudges in mind, my approach drastically changes. And holding bad memories of the past in interactions with the concerned people, only increases the animosity.

I tried doing this instead. I slowly tried getting rid of bad memories involving someone. It did wade away little by little, and with time, the memories didn't matter to me anymore. Of course, I've not succeeded in winning over all my bad memories as yet, working on it, though.

Also, celebrating the bad past of a person, decreases the chance to change himself for the better, instead it provokes him more and might change him for the worse. Instead, just let go, and if he really changes for good, please welcome.

Another important message in the film is about inner peace. "Anything is possible with inner peace". The biggest excuse that I've been giving is not starting to meditate. I've heard and read that connecting to ourselves is an experience by itself. I'm not sure what prevents me from doing it, but I'm mentioning it here, so I'm forced to do it. Will keep you posted on how it goes :)

And Po meeting Shen close to the village he was born, makes me ponder a lot about destiny, which is again debatable and am not much talking about now, maybe in the future, if I am destined to ;)

On our walk back home after the movie, I was told that the Panda might have been chosen as the dragon warrior to signify "Tao"(black and white), might be true, as there was the symbol of Tao in a couple of places in the movie.

Watching children laugh at the cinemas, made me laugh more. Heights of creativity, lots of humor and highest level of message conveyed, make this movie a wholesome package. The movie ended with Po's dad saying "My son is alive", which makes me wait for a sequel :)

Pranchiyettan and the Saint

Got to catch this movie yesterday and absolutely loved it. It is the first ever Malayalam film that I saw. I didn't understand the language much, but subtitles were of great help. I believe Mammooty uses the typical Trissur accent in the movie, I wasn't able to enjoy much of that though, but his acting was totally laudable.

The hero, Pranchi(Mammooty) is a wealthy man who stays discontented in life for the most part. When he goes to the church, he sees Saint Francis, whom Pranchi is a staunch believer of. The fictional conversation that happens between Pranchi and the Saint is what the whole film is about.

Pranchi keeps cribbing to the saint about a lot of encounters with different people and calls himself a failure. His attempts to make himself a big man in society end up in vain. Now he wants to adopt a boy as his son and asks the Saint if that will also end up otherwise.

This is when the saint gives him a vision of what is happening in the lives of other people to whom Prachi thought he lost. And everyone one of them were having their own set of problems.

The learning for me from this film - staying contented with what is destined to me. I will still try working towards my goal, but if I end up not-succeeding, I'd better not call it failure. There is a big picture that I am not aware of, so I'd rather not jump into conclusions.

The movie reminds me of another famous saying - Count your blessings. I never know the value of anything I have, until I lose it. I know this for a fact, but I've not grown a bit.

More than calling the conversation between Pranchi and the Saint a fiction or fantasy, I like calling it introspection and realization. Since Saint Francis was the one who Prachi always looked up to, he got his realization through him.

The message was conveyed in a very humorous way.

Knowing the language would have been a plus for me, but I am contented with everything else that the movie had to give :)

Indians ridiculing India?

I came across this article in "The NY times" today and felt very bad. It was written by an Indian, sadly, he chose to write of India's (so-called)downfall and some of the reasons he gives are way too trivial.

First of all, I wouldn't prefer to give the article such a topic - "Uncompromising practicality could be India's downfall". Downfall? All of us know India is growing in leaps and bounds.

Changing lanes at will, jumping traffic lights, clinging on to the train doors, are these even reasons?

Corruption(more among politicians, the whole nation isn't corrupt) is an ongoing problem and the awareness among the people has increased, which is evident from the recent Assembly election results, where there is a change in Government in many of the states.

I think we tend to do this sometimes - generalize the exceptions. That is what is done here. How fair is it to take a few examples, and then apply it to "all Indians"?

Which country in the world would not have such problems/people? Somehow, a lot of us take pride in calling India bad. I haven't much heard much from people of other countries, talking ill of their own nations.

Time to think..... Jai Hind!

A short film teaching life's lessons

Got to watch a short film a couple of days back, was amazed as to how, such important life messages could be communicated so clearly and effectively in an eight-minute film.

Its a tamil short film named "5 rooba"(5 rupees), the link as below. For those who don't have the time to watch the video or don't understand the language, the gist of the movie is as below.

There is this little boy who sees a balloon vendor in his village and wants to buy a particular balloon, but doesn't have the money. The vendor asks him to get the money and buy the balloon when he comes again, the following week. This boy comes back home and tells his mom that he wants the balloon that costs Rs.5. His mom asks him to save the 50 paise that she gives him everyday to get something for himself to eat, so he could get the balloon with the money he saved.

He starts saving the money. While coming back from school one day, he sees his friends eating at a road-side shop. I can totally imagine how hungry he would be after a tiring day at school and seeing other kids eat, surely would tempt him to get something for himself too and skip his saving-for-the-balloon. Still, he walks back home straight, keeping the goal in mind. This shows how firm and undistracted he was towards attaining what he wanted to.

He finally saves Rs.5 and very happily leaves to school one morning. When he comes back home, to his dismay he doesn't find the money that he had taken to school in the morning. Not losing hope, he runs back to school in search of it, but fails. He tells his mom that he is ready to give-up his desire and can be contented with what he already has, because of a mistake he committed. Seeing him disappointed on not being able to achieve what he wanted to, his mom feels bad and so she takes a new 5-rupee-note and gives it to him, but lies to him that she saw him dropping it on the ground. She does so, so her son doesn't feel guilty for having lost the money.

This is exactly what our parents do for us. Each of them have their own way of bringing us up, but their ultimate aim is to make sure we are happy always, and grow up as good individuals. The toughest task is to balance both of these. The conflict arises when they don't exactly know what we are passionate about, which makes us think they wouldn't want to support us. They do a lot of things(sacrifices) for us, and don't even let us know if its something that might make us feel sad, like the mom in the movie did. The boy didn't know till the end that he had actually lost the money.

He takes the money and goes to the place where he can find the balloon-vendor, and waits. The vendor finally appears, but tells him that the same balloon is now Rs.6, but agrees to sell it for Rs.5 and asks the boy to give him Re.1 later. His happiness knew no bounds. He holds the balloon and starts screaming and running. Unfortunately, he trips and falls and the balloon breaks.

I'm sure we have seen similar situations in our lives as well. We work towards attaining/achieving something and after all the hard work and time spent for it, we either end up not getting it, or having got it, it is very short-lived. Sometimes we blame others for what happened to us, not knowing what the complete picture is. If the boy hadn't got the balloon in the first place, there are many choices for him - blaming his mom for not having encouraged him to get it or blaming the person who stole his money or the balloon-vendor for increasing the price and so on.

I think the ideal thing to do is to analyze if our work towards attaining the goal was sufficient/good enough. If not, we have to start working towards to it, rather than wasting time thinking who we can blame for our failure. We are not here to prove a point to anybody else. We are here for our own purpose.

Despite all the hard-work, if we still end up not getting what we wanted, it is still fair to continue doing what we have to do, with the same spirit, which is what the boy did. Knowing that he lost the balloon, for which he worked so hard, he started saving money again, hoping he can buy it again the following week.

Everything is short-lived, so we might as well not attach ourselves much.

Its a simple story, but the messages it conveys are of a very high value(destiny, non-attachment to the fruits of action, parents' love, hard-work, taking responsibility for one's own actions). The lessons that I have learnt from various books so far, are so clearly and easily conveyed in this single short film. Hats-off to the creators and I hope they come up with many more of such creations.

Grow and become child-like

I spent a week with my 4-year-old nephew, and it was a revelation.

I've never spent a lot of time with kids, so this was an experience by itself and a much-needed change from my daily routine.

A lot of realizations.... My brother said, it was not long ago when we were kids, visiting our aunts/uncles for vacations. We could hardly believe that we ourselves are uncles and aunts now. I recall my childhood when my brother and me used to consider our dad out-dated for anything he did. Each time he tells a story about his childhood, be it how inexpensive things used to be, how they knew the value for money, how there was comparatively less vehicles and lesser pollution, how they were contended with the simple life-style they led, and much more, I used to either get bored of his same-old-stories or not even care to listen what he tried to convey.

Now I can easily picturise myself in his position. If I keep telling this - when I was a child, I could cycle to school without traffic hassles, I paid a lot lesser school fees, I used to listen to my dad's words implicitly, didn't know how a laptop looked like, iphones didn't even exist et all, any kid who gets to hear this, will no doubt call me a fool. Life is a circle, you get what you give. I envy these kids for the amount of exposure they get and how well they use it.

I took my nephew to the Microsoft visitor center, which housed almost all of Microsoft's recent products, presuming he will get all excited, but he proved me wrong. He behaved as though he was a pro at everything out there, but apparently I hear he is very new to Microsoft products(an apple expert, though :). By the time I would read the instructions to figure out what can be done with a certain gadget, he would have tried his hands on it and succeeded.

We show him a Windows phone at the Microsoft store and ask him what it was and he inadvertently shouts "Its an ipod". We couldn't control laughing and had to plan to take him to the apple store, so he feels at-home ;)

His eagerness to learn and focus is tremendous. Be it chess or ping-pong, its a delight watching him play. Though a beginner, the terminologies he uses would make anyone think he is a champ. Wish I could be as flexible a learner as him.

Unconditional love can come only from kids. He keeps saying "I love you" and "I miss you" and you can fall flat for it. He doesn't love me because I gave/will give him something. He loves me, for no reasons at all.

You scold him very badly, and he is sure to forget all of it in less than 10 minutes. Wonder how kids can have no ego at all.

I wish I could grow, and become child-like :)

I love you "best-buy" and miss you so much and hope we will get to spend time together soon.

I pray that he always remain healthy and happy.

Dr. Wayne Dyer - My man!

Ever since I started following him, I've been in total awe. Reading his works is inspiring. To watch him in action is a treat. At 71, he is as young and active as ever. There is this calmness that surrounds him.

His words are simple but effective. They may appear trivial, but has deep meanings. The best thing about him is the real-life examples he gives that make you realize, more than understand what he tries to convey.

I watched his movie, "The Shift" a couple of days back and totally loved it. It describes the shift in life, from being ambition-oriented to meaning-oriented. These days I often tend to think "What next?". I go to school, then college, get a job, get married, have kids and what next? Where am I heading towards? What is my purpose? What am I meant to do in this life?

Having worked for 5 years in the past, I somehow didn't have a sense of satisfaction in what I was doing, except for the fact that I was paid. What is it that I'm destined to do then? It is with all these questions that I watched the movie and was amazed by an example that Wayne gave.

(Sorry, if I don't communicate it as effectively as he does)

When you are in your mother's womb, you don't do anything, meaning, there is a Force that does everything. The Force acts on you, and you surrender to it. You don't struggle or resist it. Then why is it that you do all that once you are out and start growing. Why don't you just surrender?

This is exactly what the most-popular verse in Bhagavad Gita says too.

sarva-dharman parityajya

mam ekam saranam vraja

aham tvam sarva-papebhyo

moksayisyami ma sucah

Abandon all varieties of religion and just surrender unto Me. I shall deliver you from all sinful reaction. Do not fear.

Though I'm still not clear, atleast I know(hope I know) in which direction to move.

When can I surrender? Only when I ditch all the ego I have. Wayne said EGO is "Edging God Out"(love this). Ego is the false-self. It is basically the feeling of "I" am doing and "I" have the power to control what "I" am doing. I know what all this means, but all the confusions arise when putting everything to practice. The key is "Let go, let God".

Watch this album of the movie.

"Life is not a race, you don't have to run. You might as well slow down, take a look around, instead of chasing everyone.."

I just started reading Wayne's blog and am liking it.

Another video of Wayne that I loved.

"You don't criticize a gift......" Wow!

For those who are not familiar with him, do get to know him. You'll fall in love.